Why I can't Enjoy Every Moment

When you become a parent there is a universal occurrence that happens to everyone from the very beginning. This phenomenon is something that always happens from the time that you announce your pregnancy. People start to give you advice. It seems like everyone has something to say about how to raise and care for your children. Some things you are told as a new parent are very helpful, some are outdated and some are so silly they are laughable. One piece of advice that I often hear over and over again is to, “enjoy them while they are young” or, “enjoy every moment.”

I know this is well meaning advice, I know I will look back and tell future or new parents a variant of the same exact thing. But honestly this is about the hardest thing to do sometimes. I’ll be completely frank and say that sometimes I just can’t enjoy the moment. In fact, sometimes, I down right can’t stand the moment. I know some of you are probably thinking, gosh, did she really just admit that? I did. I love being a Stay at Home Mom overall, but let’s face it, being a mom is hard. Even saying that “it is hard,” is a bit of an understatement. At times it feels impossible, it’s maddening, it’s frustrating, it makes you feel desperate, it’s thankless, it’s boring, it’s lonely, it’s never-ending, it’s physically and mentally draining, you lose your identity, you lose your hobbies, your freedom, your ability to take care of your own basic needs at times; and sometimes it’s just not very fun. So no, a lot of times I feel like I can barely enjoy or make it through a moment or a day, much less enjoy every little moment of every day.

Being a mom is like being in any relationship, you have your ups and you have your downs, and I don’t think that we should have to feel like we should love every little moment of being with your kids to really love your kids or to be a good mom. Going even further than being a Mom, being a Stay at Home Mom is this unique thing where it’s sort of a job, but at the same time, it is not. It’s an extremely taxing task, it feels like work most of the time, yet it’s not quite a job in that it never ends, you don’t get paid and you never get to punch the clock and leave, and you certainly don’t get to take sick days. It is work, but it’s also life and love and is everything you are all about. It’s a unique task, but if I am comparing it to a job, it’s just not fair or realistic to expect me to love every minute of it, as most people, even if they love their jobs, don’t love every minute they spend working.

From the time that my oldest was born, it all of a sudden became all about him and eventually now that I have three children six and under, my entire day consists of taking care and thinking about them. I understand being a parent is selfless dedication; I went into the job knowing this and have made it my mission to be devoted to them and make the right choices to raise them according to my values. But just because I am now a mom, I didn’t stop being a grownup with grownup interests and desires. I am not saying that I don’t want to be selfless and I’m not saying I am not up for this job. I am not even complaining that I don’t want to have this job or give up all the things I once thought were so important. I’m just saying I can’t be expected to enjoy every little moment. I just can’t.

Now that I am a mom I don’t read as much, I don’t sew as much, I rarely spend time with friends. When you are a parent, you sacrifice a great deal. I knew this was going to happen, but being honest, sometimes I don’t want to play Legos and sing the ABCs all day. No, bringing three kids to the Zoo or to the Museum isn’t always fun. And meal time. Well, let’s just say, that is never fun. Going places with my kids is stressful and crazy and to say I have my hands full doing things like that is an understatement. As a mom I do feel pressure to act like that stuff is fun all the time. No I don’t really want to play toys and have tea parties all day. It’s not like that stuff is all bad, but really, it’s not always that enjoyable. I am not saying I don’t like to play with my kids. I am saying don’t expect me to enjoy it every second of the day. Parenting isn’t easy when your kids are screaming and fighting and crying. As a mom I have to try to act calm even when I am sad or feel like crying myself. As a mom, there are moments I can’t stand. My kids can be clingy, cranky, messy, demanding and impossible to please, so sometimes when I hear, “enjoy it while it lasts,“ I am thinking to myself, I can’t wait until this very moment is long gone.

Overall, even after saying that there are many moments that I do not enjoy, being a parent is wonderful. I can’t say that I would trade being a mom for anything in the world, but there are single moments of Motherhood that I would trade for anything else in the world. There are moments where my child is having a tantrum and screaming and crying and I just want to run away. Just please let this moment pass. But then there is also that moment where my child is crying from sadness and I wouldn’t trade being able to hold them and console them for anything in the world. So I do buck up and I do take the good with the bad. This is what the job entails.

There have been moments where I’ve been proud or awestricken. There are moments when your child takes their first step or smiles for the first time or tells you they love you or says something so cute you can barely take it. Yes, I can get caught up in reckless playing with my children and just be having a perfect blissful moment. There are even moments that don’t mean anything that I love. Sometimes I can just look over at my kids and think, God, I love being their Mom. There are wonderful, amazing moments that catch you by surprise and make parenthood so special. I cherish those moments, and I know I will be sad when some of those moments are long gone. But I think it’s unrealistic to think that I need to cherish every single moment. So no, I can’t enjoy every moment, so let’s stop implying that we should. What I can do is try to enjoy enough little moments so that I can look back and think yes, I did okay.

When talking to my single friends looking for love, I keep hearing women ask, “Just where are all the Princes anyway?” I think from the time us women are very young we expect our lives are going to end up like a Disney Movie. We look for the handsome prince to scoop us up, sweep us off our feet, and carry us off into the sunset on the back of their white horse and onward to the castle in the sky. Snow White sang our mantra, “Someday My Prince Will Come,” and that little tune warms our hearts and we nod with hypnotic visions of what love is supposed to be in our eyes and unrealistic expectations in our brains.

So now, when we’re in our 20’s & 30’s and 40’s and single or divorced or even in an imperfect marriage, we question: Where’s my prince, my knight in shining armor, why can’t my life be like the movies? Well, I’m here to say #1 we don’t live in the movies and #2 maybe the prince doesn’t really exist. Are you sad yet? The same childhood movies that fool us into thinking what a prince is really supposed to be like, is also the same movies that show us plainly that these princely guys may not be the dreamy men that we think they’re all cracked up to be.

Take Snow White for example, her so-called “prince” is actually kind of clueless and creepy. When The Prince finds her in the woods after being lost and confused, he scares her half to death and Snow White actually runs away from him. The Prince doesn’t take the hint at all, he shows up and kisses her when he thinks she’s dead. This kind of freaky postmortem fetish isn’t really up my alley at all, but somehow makes birds chirp, dwarves dance and awakens Snow White to her senses. We all know a good kisser is a plus, but come on, no man is that good.

That brings me to Cinderella and her prince, Prince Charming. So Cinderella meets Prince Charming at the ball, he instantly falls in love with her, yet even after an entire night of dancing doesn’t even bother to learn her name. So then he has the brilliant idea of finding the girl he “loves” by saying he will marry anybody who fits into the shoe he’s carrying around. I mean, luckily he found the right woman, but what are the odds? How many of your friends have the same shoe size as you? I’m pretty sure it was a ploy to fulfill his foot fetish and he was really willing to pick the first girl he wanted based on the feel of her foot. This feeling of kismet is tempting, but keep moving Cinderella, you can do better.

Moving on to Princess Aurora and Prince Phillip. First of all, he still lives with his parents. Ugh. This tells us he probably doesn’t have a job and isn’t very ambitious. Then, he’s another one who kisses girls while they’re sleeping. This is called Date Rape, ladies. Stay away!

Moving on to Jasmine and Aladdin. Where do I start? Aladdin is a reckless, homeless, bad boy, thief that lies about everything he is to get Jasmine to like him. If this was real, all your girl friends would tell you how bad this guy is. Once a liar, always a liar. Dump him immediately.

What about Peter Pan? This guy starts the relationship being a peeping tom & watching Wendy through her windows at night. This is not endearing ladies, this is creepy. Then we find out Peter is an immature player (hello, Tinker bell, Tiger Lilly) that refuses to act mature. We all have dated guys like this and all he wants to do is play video games and run around with his friends. You can not change him. He will never grow up. Avoid!

While growing up, who hasn’t wanted to live in a magical castle. Too bad in Belle’s case this meant living with a controlling, verbally abusive, self centered monster like the Beast. I’d suggest he get anger management classes immediately and Belle get the hell out of that situation before it’s too late and things get worse.

Then we have Flynn Ryder in Tangled. He’s another thief that gets incarcerated. Keep moving Rapunzel, a guy with a rap sheet is not a catch.

This brings me to Prince Eric from the Little Mermaid. This guy doesn’t care about who he’s with as long as she’s a good singer. This seems very shallow to me. Eric goes back and fort from this Ursula/ Vanessa character and then to Ariel so easily, we all know he’s not being genuine with either one. Another thing, Eric seems so clueless, that even when on a date and they’re under the glow of the moon and romantic music is playing, Ariel is dropping hints all over the place, he still can’t take the initiative and just “Kiss the Girl.” We all know this guy is a Mamma’s boy and we would totally have to do everything for him and teach him everything. I don’t know about you, but I need a man that can do things for himself. This guy is totally leaving his clothes on the bathroom floor and knows absolutely nothing in the bedroom. No thank you. Next.

Then we have Captain John Smith. First of all, he needs to respect boundaries and not be kissing Pocahontas when she already has a boyfriend. Then, in talking to Pocahontas, he reveals his true racist feelings, saying his people have improved the lives of the “Savages.” Come on Pocahontas, don’t degrade yourself like this. Find a man who appreciates you for you and respects your culture.

So after running down the list of all the so-called heroic princes that we all love, I have to ask the question: Are women really that naive or are we taught from our youth to pick the wrong men? I am pleading with all you women out there, please don’t be like Snow White. Please don’t stare dreamingly up to the sky and sing how someday your prince will come and imagine being with a man that you don’t even know exists or not. Get out of the house and hop on your own white horse. Don’t dream about the castle in the sky, because this is more unrealistic that the American Dream. We all know neither one exist in the way fairy tales tell us they do. I’m sure there’s a great guy out there for you, but he’s not from the Disney movies, and frankly thank God, because those guys are losers!

Can a Feminist Raise a Gentleman?

When I was brining my kids to school this morning and we were headed in the building, we came across a young girl, struggling to open the heavy front door of the building. My two older kids were several steps ahead of me and I told my 5 (almost 6) year old son to help the girl with the door. We continued on our way to the classroom and while walking I reminded my son, “It’s always polite to hold the door for others. Especially girls. That’s called being a Gentleman.” This isn’t out of the ordinary of something I may say to him, I’m always trying to teach my kids about being polite and helping others. But I started to think that it almost felt odd telling my 5 year old that holding doors especially for girls was the right thing to do. Usually when I tell my kids things, they usually ask “why.” This particular time, nobody asked why, but I was thinking in my head, maybe he would ask and I couldn’t come up with a great 5 year old answer other than,” because that’s what a gentleman or a good boy does.” So that got me thinking about other things we teach our Sons that is along the same lines. Never hit a person, but especially a girl. When you walk in a doorway, let a girl go first.

Maybe 5 isn’t a good age to make this distinction, but then when is a good age to make this differentiation? When exactly does the gentlemen training begin? So now I turn to the feminist inside me and my question is: can we raise good little gentlemen without teaching them to be sexist? I would encourage my son to be helpful to anyone that needed help of course, but there is something in our society that makes it extra polite to help a girl and later on, a woman. I mean, we all want our sons to be good to women and I think it’s a common idea that a man that opens your door for you and pays for your dinner is a good catch, right! And obviously hitting a woman is absolutely wrong and terrible. And, although not right as well, hitting a man in society is much more accepted than hitting a woman. But at what point can we teach this to a boy? When can we say, “don’t hit little so and so on the playground, because she’s a girl.” So now I have to ask, can a man (or a boy) treat the other sex, like the fairer sex, without being sexist?

I have 2 boys and 1 girl in my house and I can say in our family we are just at the point of saying, “you can’t hit anyone.” No one doesn’t get hit because they’re a girl, no one gets to go first because they’re a girl, no one gets anything different because of who they are. When it comes to siblings (I have 1, 3 & 5 year olds) they don’t understand that kind of logic, and it would make an unfair playing field when I often have to break up wrestling matches and arguments if I was always favoring my daughter. With 3 kids close in age, when it comes to toys, everybody plays with everything. We never tell our daughter she can’t do something because she’s a girl and I will correct our children if they say, “that’s a boys toy or a girls toy.” I can’t say that we live in a gender neutral home because my daughter wears plenty of pink and has a million princess Barbies. That being said, my daughter would rather play with dinosaurs and dig worms out of the ground than anything else, and both my sons have played with dolls. I wouldn’t say I’m raising sexist children, but is that not really true when I teach my son to be good to girls.

I teach my kids everyone is equal. We treat everyone with kindness. We help people, especially those who can’t help themselves. But where does the “ladies and gentlemen” part of all that come in to play. If everyone is equal and girls can do everything that boys can do, when is it fair to introduce the idea that as a boy, you will treat girls differently, and how is that fair in elementary school? If we want our girls to be strong and our boys to be respectful, how exactly does a feminist raise her boys, and can she raise a Gentleman?

I do think this whole Ladies and Gentlemen thing can be accomplished even with a feminist approach, and I do think that there is a balance.. but I want to hear how you raise your boys or girls to be Ladies and Gentlemen, or tell me, is that notion becoming extinct?

Cyber Bullying and Social Media Responsibility

Last week a 14 year old boy killed himself because of bullying. Jamey Rodemeyer was being bullied both in school and online. A terrible tragedy all around. He was terribly bullied at school and he used an online blog to vent his frustrations. When classmates caught wind of his blog, they then began harassing him online. Telling him he was fat and ugly, he should die, calling him homophobic slurs, etc. I'm sure you've seen the press and seen the Trending Topics on Twitter about him, His idol, Lady Gaga, is now asking the president to make bullying a crime. I wholeheartedly agree. This stuff is dangerous.
As a member of a greater online community and an avid user of social media, it makes me sick and it makes me question our roles and our duty as fellow social media-ites. Now there's some specifics I don't know about specifically on the Jamey Rodemeyer case. I don't know who saw the threats or who saw his cries for help. (he posted on Facebook he was going to join his grandmother who had previously died) and gave subtle clues as to what he was going to do on his blog. Obviously hindsight is 20/20. I can't say there was time to save him, also I can't that that any kind words or any gestures could have saved him either. But it makes me question the other things I've seen and what a person seeing such things should do. Could do?
Now we've all probably been on You-Tube and seen the comment section. I probably don't even have to go on about that. I've given up even scrolling down because there's always negative comments and it always turns racist or sexist or homophobic, etc. Horrible. I don't think there would be any point or use even trying to comment on there. I don't know what is going through people's heads when they make those kind of comments, but something to the extent of just trying to cause a stir, and obviously a lot of hate.
I've also seen things on a much smaller scale that makes me question people's gang or gang-up-on mentality. Let me give you an example of how I've seen comment sections on a post bring out the inhumanity in people.
On Facebook I'm subscribed to a local police page. During the recent flooding they updated their followers about road closures, area conditions, etc. They posted a message that the area was in a state of emergency and to stay off the roads. So there was a few short non-memorable comments of thanks and then one individual started in on a rant, posted things like, "F*** the police, government is evil, don't do what the police say, police are pus***." And so on.
Okay so this is stupid, disrespectful, immature, this is a hundred things. But what happened next is really deplorable. People started ganging up on this individual in an alarming way. Now to give some side notes: this is just Facebook, and most of the people that are subscribed to this particular police page are from a community of about 9,000 people or the surrounding area. These are just run of the mill small town local citizens, Mothers, Fathers, run of the mill locals, mostly adults. Not what I would say was an average hateful group. And also it's Facebook, all real names and profiles were used. The comments started flooding in saying, "shut up," "you should die," "I hope you drown in the flood," "you are worthless.". It went on and on. Now what this young man said was stupid and disrespectful. He bantered back some and the barrage of hateful things went back to him. I wondered, am I really the only one who thinks that all the people who told this person to kill himself and that he was worthless, that they ought to be ashamed of themselves? How could some stupid comments bring this sort of hate out of rather seemingly regular people.
I wanted to say something in response. I wanted to say that they ought to look inside their very souls and be ashamed. But I didn't. I didn't say anything. I didn't want to get involved. I didn't agree with either side, but the retaliation, this ganging-up-on mentality was sickening. Most people may say that the anti-police sentiment was sickening.. but the backlash was what I couldn't stomach.
I look back now after seeing the Jamey story. Should I have said something? Now I know it's not exactly the same thing, and I know for a fact that all parties involved in this case were not minors. (If it had been a minor, I most definitely would have said something). But we don't know what this person is going through or why they're so angry. Could these awful things make a suicidal person follow through with it? I don't know. Possibly. I'm not saying this person was anywhere near suicidal, but we don't know that for sure. Did anyone actually think Jamey was going to kill himself? Even after his warnings and cries for help? Probably not. Should I have said something? I think so. Will I say something in the future? I hope so.

Pancakes For Dinner

This isn't necessarily a FOOD BLOG, although I do plan to write entries about food and include recipes that I think are too great not to share. This blog isn't a PANCAKE BLOG either, although I do plan on sharing some really great pancake recipes with you weekly. Pancakes For Dinner is instead a symbol of the type of mom I am.
 
I'll be honest, for some reason or another, cooking hasn't really ever been my thing. Whether it's because I never really spent time with my mom in the kitchen when I was younger, or because I was a picky eater growing up, or that I married a Chef (now turned catering supervisor), for some reason I never really "learned how to cook." 
Quite frankly, I never really wanted to. Now that I'm a mom of 3 and my husband works a lot of late nights, much to my dismay, I've become more and more the family Chef, and because I am picky about what my kids eat, frozen Dinners are no longer an acceptable staple of my, and certainly not my kid's diet.  
I'm sure my Mother would be mortified to see me eat a Frozen Dinner.  Before I went to college, when I lived at home, we never had anything to eat that wasn't made from scratch. We ate meatloaf, and crockpot meals, spaghetti and meatballs, pork chops and casseroles, and most definitely always the homemade kind of mac and cheese. I had never eaten stovetop stuffing, instant mashed potatoes, or anything Chef Boyardee. I didn't even know that cheese came in a can.
When I went to college and lived in my own apartment and then when I lived in an apartment with my soon to be husband, if he didn't make me a homemade meal and if it couldn't be made in the microwave, I didn't eat it. 
So as life went on, I happily continued my laziness in the kitchen. That is, until I had kids. I'm not Super Mom by any means, but I am picky when it comes to my kids and when they started eating food, i started out making all their baby food from real foods in the blender.   Completely homemade. Gasp. Surprised? When it comes to my kids, I don't like foods with a ton of additives and try to stay away from added dies and definitely no artificial sugar. So bye bye frozen meals, and now, more and more I have to make homemade meals for my kids.   I'm not going to lie, I sometimes make my kids box Mac & Cheese, or Neon Noodles as my Mother would call them.  Like I said, I'm not Super Mom, and yes, I know it's a contradiction to the whole dye thing.. but sometimes it's just easier.  That being said, I am always trying to find kid friendly recipes that are both mostly healthy and not do require that I'm going to be stuck in the kitchen for extensive periods of time. 
With 3 kids I know it's important to ensure good things go into their bodies, but let's face it, it definitely isn't always easy. On the nights that I'm doing it alone and my husband is working late, you can usually look into my house and see: my older son doing homework that needs my assistance.. I'm trying to dig for a number 2 pencil that I could have sworn was in the bottom of the junk drawer, while my 3 year old daughter is pulling out the Twister game that she wants to play while knocking over the already leaning stack of games out of her closet, begging me to play. 

We just played Chutes and Ladders 3 times. 

Baby's screaming because he got woken up from his nap, I'm trying to blot up the spilled milk off the carpet, the phones ringing, the sinks full of dishes and there's barely enough room to get a pot of water from the faucet. Kids are starting to say they're hungry. Oh crap, now the baby's getting into the board games. Bingo chips are everywhere. And sometimes I just gotta say, "screw it kiddos, it's Pancakes For Dinner." 
OK, I don't really say, "screw it," out loud in front of the kids, but I'm thinking it for sure! 
Sometimes it's the kind of night where it's going to be Pancake mix from the box, throw on the water & cut up some banana slices on the side and that's it. Other nights it's that with some sausage on the side. On nights where I'm feeling a bit more adventurous, I'll add fun things like puréed vegetables (my secret weapon), make fun shapes or really go crazy and add things like ricotta cheese. For my first recipe I'm going to go all pancake exotic on you and share one that's a little fancy.  Bonus: It's healthy and chock full of stuff which makes it a complete meal with protein and vegetables.  Enjoy! 
This Recipe Comes from Jessica Seinfeld's cook book: Deceptively Delicious.

Pink Pancakes

Prep time: 10 Minutes, Total Time: 13-15 minutes, Serves 4

The Ingredients
Yes, I am using canned beets in this one.. of course fresh from the ground would be better, but let's face it: if I had time to roast and peel and cut beets for an hour, then we wouldn't be having pancakes for dinner.. am I right?!

Ingredient List:

3/4 cup water
1/2 cup ricotta cheese
1/4 cup beet puree
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/2 cup pancake mix
1/4 grated apple
Nonstick cooking spray
1 tablespoon canola or vegetable oil
Pure Maple Syrup or fruit, for serving

1) In a blender or food processor, combine the water, ricotta cheese, beet puree, vanilla and cinnamon and blend, add the pancake mix and apple, and stir until just combined.  Do not overmix- the batter will be a little lumpy.

2) Coat a griddle or large nonstick skillet with cooking spray and set it over medium-high heat.  When hot, add the oil.  Spoon the batter onto the griddle or skillet, using about 1/4 cup for each pancake.  Cook the pancakes until bubbles form on top and the batter is set, 1 to 2 minutes.  Then flip the pancakes with a spatula and cook until golden brown on the other side, 2 to 3 minutes.  Serve warm, with syrup or fruit.



My Secret Weapon
This time I just threw the Beets in the Magic Bullet and Pureed, which took seconds
If you want to do the stuff from the ground:  Leave them whole (trim stems to 1 inch) and unpeeled, wrap in aluminum foil and roast at 400 degrees for about 1 hour (they're done when they can be pierced with tip of a sharp knife).  After peeling, place in a food processor or blender for about 2 minutes.  Be prepared to have red fingers.

Blend away, super easy!

I thought my kids were going to detect the apple pieces and not be happy, but you couldn't even tell they were in there.

They're super pink alright.. Perfect for valentine's day!

the recipe made 10 pancakes total.  It fed me and my 3 kids with 1 to spare.

My kids would say, "voilà"

My 2 older children's servings, I cut up some bananas and served on the side.

This is what I ate.. surprisingly very delicious!  Try it!

Peeping Mom

I’ll come right out and say that in the past I have never really been a person to follow blogs & read them regularly.   Before that statement starts not making sense, since, in-fact, you are reading my new blog, I’ll say that lately through my Twitter interactions, I’ve come across a number of GREAT blogs that are so intriguing & compelling that they’ve become like a good novel to me. I can’t put it down. Like any good page turning book, a great blog sometimes becomes this thing that you just. Can’t. Stop. Reading. Each new post is like a chapter I can’t wait to dive in to, race to the end to find out what happens next in the story. I only wish I could write something like that. I love writing, I love current events and hot topics, and I love connecting with people and talking about my kids.. The next step, (to start blogging that all together), just seems like something that makes sense to me.

Reading someone’s blog is almost a guilty pleasure for me. It makes me feel like a stalker in a way. Maybe not a stalker, but more like a Peeping Tom. I mean, the blogger obviously wants people to read their words & follow their story. That’s the whole point. But still, reading a personal blog makes me feel as if I’m sneaking into their bedroom when they’re out of the house and reading their diary. I feel like I have to keep looking up towards the door to make sure they’re not going to walk in at any second and catch me stealing their innermost secrets. When I’m done, I’ll just close the book, turn the lock and place it carefully in the drawer exactly the way it was. Maybe that makes me a Peeping Mom?

So since you are here to peep into my online, public, not so secret diary, I’ll give you a little peek into what my life is like. My real name is Andrea, I also go by the Twitter name, @Mango1531. Mango was a nickname I used when I went to girl scout camp about a million years ago (really like 16 or so) & now it seems to follow me on all my online stuff. I’m 30 years old, nearing 31. Oh gosh, tell me that’s not old?! I’m married to a great man, Mr. T., that I try not to take for granted. You know how it is though, even a great man can his annoy his wife. Especially if said wife is stuck at home all day with their 3 charming children, and he just called me to ask if our youngest was born on the 20^th or 21^st.  Really?!  Oh yeah and he’s stuck at work and won’t be home for dinner either.   He is nothing like the T.V. personality, Mr. T. actually, so don’t picture that.. but he has a professional career and life, and I’m not about to blab too much about him right now. We have 2 boys & 1 girl in-between, Big Bubs, Little Boo & Little Babe, ages 5, 3 & 1 respectively.

Upon diving into Twitter & now the blogging world I’ve thought about talking about my kids online and if this is such a good idea or not. There’s the notion, right or wrong, that it will welcome stalkers or pedophiles into our world. Maybe a bit extreme, and I’ve never actually heard of that happening.. But should I be publishing pictures or my location and my kids names for the world to know? Honestly I’m not even sure the answer, but as I dive into this blogging world, I’m going to play it by ear and find out. I’ve mainly wondered in this connected world we live in, should I be giving my kids such an enormous online presence before they’ve even graduated from Playschool Disney or Nick Jr. and moved onto making an online life for themselves by themselves. So far I’ve never mentioned my kids names on Twitter and have only posted a couple pictures.. I’m taking baby steps. I love social media with a capital “L,” but I’ve also always been grateful that Facebook didn’t exist when I was in high school, because I’m sure it would have gotten me in a lot of trouble. It’s not even like I was a trouble maker, per say, but when I was in my youth I’m sure glad that whatever I was doing was being kept in a secret diary locked in the drawer and pictures stayed in albums, and not online. I didn’t join Facebook until I was a mom, so there’s no drunk dancing (or worse) pictures of me online. We didn’t even have digital camera’s or smart phones in High school so I’m safe that not too much is going to be dug up from my past. I do feel like it’s my responsibility to keep my kids information at least somewhat private so at they can make their own decisions about their online presence and decide for themselves if they want to look like a fool for the world to see. So with that being said, I’m not going to publish their real names or the location of their school. I will post other stuff though, and it looks like we’ll see what that is when we get there.

I will say that I live in a medium size city in New York State and send my kids to a public city school in a district that has a major budget deficit, which makes the whole schooling situation a bit frustrating at times. We own a home on a quiet city street that feels like living in the suburbs. I’m a stay at home mom and have been for almost 6 years. Right now that is my world. I have 3 BA degrees: in History, Sociology and Women’s Studies. I have never officially done anything with my degrees, maybe someday they will come in to play. I feel like at some point in my life I may also go back to college and pick up another degree, maybe something a bit more focused. But I’m not making any plans until I get to that point. I’m sometimes overwhelmed by my stay at home life, but I also wouldn’t have it any other way… I’ll get into more of that in Blogs to come, I am sure.

I welcome all readers and encourage you to leave comments. I love and am always looking for discussion and debating or just even a quick hello. You don’t have to feel like a Peeping Mom or Tom with me! I plan on talking about, but not limiting this blog to discussions and observations on my journey in mothering as well as hot topics and current events, and how that all pertains to me as a mom and how it effects my kids. I am always trying to look into different perspectives in life. The idea of thinking about the other side of things intrigues me so much , oddly, or maybe not so oddly, even with those or especially with those that I don’t agree with. I think we can learn something from every one and need to find compassion for everyone.

So I know this isn’t quite a page turner yet, but I’m working on that. I’ll also try to work on my run on sentences. Thanks for making it to the end. Since all good books carry some suspense.. Tune in to my next blog post to find out what the heck Pancakes have to do with anything here.